The best things about Magic:

• 7+ Mana value cards, bonus points if they are uncommon rarity or lower
• Overcosted, impractical activated abilities, bonus points if they're on legendary artifacts and/or they don't require tapping
• Overpowered activated abilities with no cost except tapping
• Jank rares (preferably not in booster packs I paid for)
• Obscure red enchantments that mess with combat
• Ramping in mono colours other than green
• Uncommon commanders (As in, rarity-wise... but also hipsterness-wise)
• Using a legendary creature where a nonlegendary version would do just fine
• Hardcasting expensive sorceries instead of holding up interaction
• For each colour: Griffins, Drakes, Horrors, Minotaurs, Wurms
• Sacrificing lands and discarding cards, hopefully to do something worthwhile